To conquer fear you must become fear.
The best way for your child to overcome their fear is to face it.
If your child is afraid of bullies, the best way is to equip your child with tools to deal with it like martial arts training.
If your child is not sure if they can pass their Fit Test, the best way is to have them attend as many classes as possible to build up their physical abilities.
If your child is afraid of sparring, the best way to help them get better is to let them spar.
If your child is shy to do things in front of other people the best way it to let them practice in front of other people.
I could go on, but I believe you get the point. It’s okay if your child goofs up, if they lose, if they get embarrassed. These are important events to know how to handle.
Most successful people experience many losses and embarrassments before achieving success. The reason is that they didn’t make excuses, they didn’t stop working on their goals, they didn’t give up when facing their fears.
I’m a parent myself. I have an eight-year-old son. I know it’s tempting to just give them a hug and say something like:
“It’s okay, honey, the other boy/girl was bigger.”
“The other kid was a higher belt than you.”
“I know you are having a bad day.”
It might make you feel better or make them feel better but it is not beneficial in long run.
Instead, ask your child if they tried to do their best! If they tell you they did, but just goofed up or lost simply reply that you are PROUD OF THEM FOR GIVING IT THEIR BEST SHOT AND LET’S DO IT AGAIN NEXT TIME. That’s it, and add a hug 🙂
Then bring them to class or schedule a private lesson so we can help you put them back on track right away and resume the road to success.
The worst thing is to not give your child a way to fix what they messed up on and pull them out of the activity because you think that it will protect your child.